I recently wrote an article for a friend of mine, Bobi Ann Allen. She is a Pastor’s wife and ministry leader that loves Jesus wholeheartedly. Her joy for the Lord is contagious and I am blessed to call her friend. I love her and you will too!
I am honored to share with her some of my experiences in life and marriage.
Check out the article, “5 Ways To Help Your Man Be The Leader You Desire,” on her site, BobiAnn.com.
As the wife of a Pastor I have many opportunities to minister alongside my husband, such as: funerals, weddings, and biblical counseling. God uses these three venues to strengthen my marriage. It is strengthened when I am reminded of the “value of today,” recalling my vows to my husband, and renewing my commitment to simply not quit.
- I grieve with those at funerals that are saying good-bye to loved ones. I cannot help but remember those that I also have said good-bye to. But in this difficult time, God is faithful to be the light so that I can see His goodness. He is faithful to see us through the days ahead. I am reminded that I’m not promised tomorrow; therefore, today should be valued as treasure. Today is a gift and every day I have with my husband evokes thanksgiving. Today is a gift that I do not want to overlook complacently, or take for granted. So, as I listen and watch him officiate at (too many) funerals, my appreciation and love for him grows ever deeper. My marriage is strengthened.
Maybe if we took “not being promised tomorrow” as the REALITY THAT IT IS, we would reconsider how we choose to live today. Today is the day the Lord has made so let us rejoice and be glad in it and embrace the gift that it is. Time. Time with our loved ones.
- When it comes to weddings, it is fun encouraging brides “to be.” I love watching them standing at the altar dressed like a “princess” as they gaze into the eyes of their “love.” Weddings tend to make me smile while simultaneously shaking my head as I recall two teenagers (my love and I) saying “I do” over 27 years ago. I am reminded of what we have been through and the difference it makes when we fight “clean” verses “ugly.” (You know, having a mature conversation verses acting like we are in middle school.) I am reminded that when we love Christ more than each other, it keeps us on the path together. My vows were to love him in sickness and in health until death do us part. (I admit sometimes we have almost been the death of each otherJ.) As I listen to my husband share a word with the couples he marries, leading them in their vows, and pronouncing them husband and wife, I find my heart saying “I do” all over again. Every time! My marriage is strengthened.
Maybe you need to reflect on what God has brought you through and the day you said “I do.” Let it encourage you to persevere and reject giving up. Maybe you need to date again… reigniting that “old flame” for one another that has grown dim.
- My husband and I also offer biblical counseling from time to time. Often we find that couples think they are the only ones going through their particular situation. The truth is “there is nothing new under the sun.” The enemy uses the same tactics in every relationship. Walking through difficult times with other couples prompts me to reassess my relationship with my spouse. Am I respecting him? Do I choose to be forgiving rather than condemning? Am I choosing to talk rather than withdrawing? Am I loving him as I love Christ? If the answer is no then it is time to strengthen my marriage. If I do not, I can be certain that the enemy is trying to tear it apart.
Maybe you are in a dark season in your marriage relationship and need to be refreshed. Know that you are not alone and that God is “for” your success. Maybe you need to assess where you are so you can strengthen what is being torn apart.
Always be encouraged. Not just in good times but in hard times as well. In this New Year commit to find the value in each day, hold firm to your vows and commit to never quit. I know it is “easier said than done,” but God will be faithful to see you through.