5 Ways To Help Your Man Be The Leader You Desire

I recently wrote an article for a friend of mine, Bobi Ann Allen. She is a Pastor’s wife and ministry leader that loves Jesus wholeheartedly. Her joy for the Lord is contagious and I am blessed to call her friend. I love her and you will too!

I am honored to share with her some of my experiences in life and marriage.

Check out the article, “5 Ways To Help Your Man Be The Leader You Desire,” on her site, BobiAnn.com.

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Romanticizing The Past

romanticizing-the-pastHer eyes danced with wonderful memories as she reflected on the good ole days; days full of happiness, fun, adventure, and freedom. I could tell she was reliving some of the fun when her mouth smirked with a grin. She knew that God had led her to where she is today, however, her present hardships left her thinking that maybe the past was not so bad, after all.

Has God ever delivered you from a difficult, painful, or unhealthy situation and yet you find yourself grumbling in your present circumstances?

  • Maybe you are minimizing the pain of a previous marriage because the new one feels hard.
  • Maybe you are minimizing the toxic relationship you were once in because you now feel lonely.
  • Maybe you are minimizing the difficulties of your childhood because being an adult stinks.

When the present feels difficult, we often romanticize the past. 

For a moment, we can forget we were once crying out to God for deliverance, begging Him to rescue us from our darkest time.

The Israelites forgot the bondage from which they had been delivered, and consequently, rejected a Holy God.

Their deliverance:

God heard their cries for help and saw their affliction. He delivered them from bondage, oppression, and great sufferings. As God led them to freedom, they journeyed through the desert and wilderness experiencing His presence, protection, and provision.  In their forty years of traveling, they never once ran out of clothing. Their shoes remained intact. Their feet did not swell, and water and food were provided.

Their rejection:

They felt reprieve as God led them from all their hardships. But something happened that caused them to romanticize their past.

They focused on their provisions instead of their Provider. This is shown throughout the book of Numbers.

We read in Numbers 11:5 how the Israelites recalled the fish, cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions, and garlic they received in Egypt because their stomachs were tired of eating the manna and quail God had provided for them. They felt so deprived of the luxurious foods that they wished they were still in Egypt. Their time in Egypt was full of traumatic experiences and yet they felt it was better than their current circumstances.

I have a name for them, “Whiney Hineys!”

Let’s not be too quick to judge them, though. Have you been a “whiney hiney” lately? Are you romanticizing your past instead of remembering your deliverance?

When we begin to feel our current circumstances are worse than our past ones, we ought to turn to God. Ask Him why. Ask Him to show us the good in the NOW. Ask Him if our feelings are lying to us. Seek Him in His Word for truth, direction, and wisdom. But, what we should not do, friend, is reject God by romanticizing what He has delivered us from. When we do that, we are saying to God that He is not worthy to follow and that He has made a mistake.

Is that what you really mean to say? I hope your answer is no.

So, let’s stop minimizing what He has brought us from, and start maximizing what He is seeing us through, NOW! He is worthy! He is forgiving! He is in control! He is who you need Him to be right now so, cling to Him like never before and rest in Him. And by the way, God never makes mistakes!

What are you thankful for in your present circumstances? I would love to hear from you. 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When To Stay-When To Go

When to stay when to goEver relocated your family for a job assignment? We moved several times while in the military. Each move required packing up our belongings, emotions, and what was familiar. Uncertainties of when we would move, where we would go, and how long we would remain was part of military life. We were at the mercy of orders handed down from Command. We learned to depend on God for comfort, wisdom, and guidance.

Are you in the process of a move?

Are you packing up your belongings, emotions, and all that is familiar?

If your answer is yes, let me comfort you with a truth. God is already where you are going. He has your back. He is working out all the details and preparing new friendships… He is also working within you a deeper dependence on Him. He wants you to be settled in Him when your circumstances feel unsettling.

God shows us in Numbers 9:15-23 how He moved the Israelites through a cycle in an effort to grow them in complete dependence, obedience, and trust in Him.

God used a cloud by day and the appearance of fire by night (representing His presence) as a sign for when they were to move, where they were to move to, and how long they were to remain. If the cloud was settled upon the tabernacle, they were to camp and remain, but if it had moved, they were to set out.

This was the cycle upon God’s command:

Set Out-Camp-Remain

Set Out-Camp-Remain

Sometimes they would remain 2 days, a month, or a year…

I imagine the Israelites waking each morning, wiping their sleepy eyes, stumbling to the entrance of their tents, and slowly pulling the curtain back to see if God’s presence was settled upon the tabernacle, or if it had moved.

They looked for His presence and leading daily.

Can we say we are doing the same thing today? Are we wiping the sleepy off of our eyes expecting to see Him each morning? Are we trusting Him as He leads us?

Relocating can make us weary. It can lead us to shift our focus away from God and onto ourselves.  When that happens, we can feel misled, unsure of our decision, and unsettled.

But, if we choose to apply Proverbs 3:5-6, we will find a settling peace and comfort in knowing we can trust God even when things do not make sense and they are hard.

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right paths. (HCSB)

The Lord will be at our side. He is a friend to the upright and blesses the home of the righteous. So, no matter where we are in the cycle of setting out-setting up- or remaining, God is at work. Look for His presence and leading daily.  He is faithful to provide comfort, wisdom, and guidance.

 

 

 

 

 

Ministry Leaders and Missionaries Unite!

This is a terrific resource for Mom’s, leaders, missionaries, and more. Stephanie Shott, along with her team, is compassionate toward those needing hope, guidance, and a friend. Take a moment and read what Stephanie has to offer and visit her ministry at www.TheMomInitiative.com

 

We’re all on the same team and we all have the same goal. Reach ’em and teach ’em! It’s the Great Commission and it’s what we are all called to. So, let’s unite, sweet friends! We can accomplish much more together than we can apart.  That’s actually what The MOM Initiative is about. Linking hearts and hands with YOU! Because we know that if we serve together, we are more effective, our boarders are enlarged, the message of the Gospel is spread farther, and more women discover the power of the Word of God. Last week, a MOM Group that … Read More

Source: Ministry Leaders and Missionaries Unite!

There Is More To It Than You Think

Crevices of heartWhen I take a test I look like a scared, wet cat clinging to a tree branch. The anxiety causes my stomach to knot up, my eyes to bug out, and I become paralyzed. Talking myself down, I imagine scooching over in my chair, and having Jesus sit beside me so He can see my exam. I take deep breaths asking Him for help. I am a realtor, which requires continuing education courses from time to time. Well, it was time! After finishing my course exam, I took another deep breath and faxed it to my instructor. I felt good about the answers I submitted. Then, the phone rang.  My instructor called to tell me I had failed the test! Confusion, doubt, and low self-esteem crept back into the crevices of my heart.  I would have to take the test again! The following four days, I rehearsed what I might have answered incorrectly. I drudged up self-talks I promised myself I would never listen to again.

Can you relate? You know the ones? Self-talk that convinces us to grab a shovel, dig a hole, and bury ourselves with lies. Lies validating our insecurities and incompetence. Lies convincing us failure will always be our companion.

In those four days, I found myself engaged in a different kind of test.

A heart test … the kind God gives.

“The refining pot is for silver, and the furnace for gold, but the LORD test hearts.” (Proverbs 17:3)

Silver and gold are refined through a purification process extracting impurities, which are then scraped away. The process is repeated until what is left shines in its purest form.

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When God test hearts, impurities are exposed, as well.

Such as:

  • Control
  • Motives
  • Perfectionism
  • Lust
  • Codependency
  • Idols
  • Covetousness
  • Comparison
  • Jealousy

Why does God test hearts?

  • To purify us that we might walk in His ways.
    • God tested Abraham with his son Isaac. (Genesis 22:1)
    • God left King Hezekiah alone only to test him, that He might know all that was in his heart. (2 Chronicles 32:31)
    • God tested the Israelite’s as they wandered in the wilderness for 40 years. (Deuteronomy 8:2)
    • You have today declared the Lord to be your God, and that you would walk in His ways and keep His statutes, His commandments, and His ordinances, and listen to His voice. ” (Deuteronomy 26:17)

 

  • To teach us to love Him with all of our heart.

…You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and all your soul, and with all your mind.” (Matthew 22:37)

  • To shape us to the image of Christ.

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His  For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son… (Romans 8:28-29)

  • To prepare us to be light in a dark world.

To quote Lysa Terkeurst, “God often meets with us in the quiet darkness of adversity just before taking us out into the light. He must strengthen the light in us before the spotlight is placed on us.”

You may not believe what I am about to share with you, but it really happened. On the fourth day, I received a second phone call from my instructor. With an electric excitement, he explained that there was a printing error on my exam and I had actually passed!

I told you that it’s hard to believe! 🙂

All of the anxiety, negative self-talk, confusion… was not wasted. God tested my heart and exposed what did not belong.

He loves us too much to leave our hearts tainted with impurities. The pressures and afflictions of life not only expose the hidden crevices, they strengthen our walk with God, and allow us the opportunity to be light in a dark world.

Can you remember the last time you were tested by God?

Did it purify your walk with Him?

Did God teach you to love Him with all of your heart?

Did God reshape you to reflect His image?

Let’s put down the shovel and not bury ourselves in lies any longer. Let’s allow God to use our trials to refine us … becoming the people He designed us to be.

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